It is well documented that for every minute that you exercise, you add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.
Food is like sex: when you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.
Q: What do you call an overweight monster?
Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Coincidence? I think not!
Needing to shed a few pounds, Robert, and his wife Jennifer, went on a diet that had specific recipes for each meal of the day. They followed the instructions extremely closely, dividing the finished recipe in half for their individual portions. Robert and Jennifer felt terrific and thought the diet was wonderful; they had never felt better, nor did they ever feel hungry.Specific diet – close, but no cigar
As time progressed, Robert and Jennifer realized that they were, in fact, putting on weight and not losing it. They decided that they ought to check the detail of the recipes just one more time. It was then that they found their error.
There, in small print, Robert and Jennifer saw, to their horror: ‘Serves 6′.